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Mahdaen.TV News – "I accidentally learned that my husband has a secret bank account containing 15,000 euros (235 million rupiah)."
The outline of a woman above appears in the frequently asked questions section with Mary O'Conor in the Independent. The secret account was really troubling because it triggered further suspicions that further complicated the situation. The woman told me that she and her husband were middle-income. Therefore, the money of 15 thousand euros is a lot.
"At the moment I suspect there is more money hidden elsewhere, because I also find the cash he hides. I want to first find out as much as possible before I ask this case to him, "he continued to tell.
In the story, he told me there was an imbalance division of tasks in his marriage life. In addition to working on almost all household chores and taking care of the child, he is also obliged to pay half of all family bills. When proposing to move home for security reasons, her husband refused.
"I feel our marriage is over. Right now I can only hope, I can move house, save my own money for my life with my children, "he concluded.
Just like infidelity, the problems that occur in couples are started from a secret fraud. The effect is the same, the erosion of interpersonal trustworthiness and to some extent will lead to acute disagreements which may very well end in divorce.
A poll for the National Endowment for Financial Education was conducted in 2016 and the results showed 42% of Americans admitted dishonest financial cases with their spouses. The forms of cheating are various, ranging from hiding money to cash, spending clandestinely, to having a bank account or a number of secret assets. Based on surveys, the most common financial fraud is the behavior of hiding cash. This behavior is done by 58 percent of respondents. While spending clandestinely reached 54 percent.
"This [kecurangan keuangan] secret is potentially creating a problem [antarpasangan]," said Don Grant, a financial adviser at Carey, Thomas, Hoover & Breault Investments in Wichita, Kansas.
Marilyn Chinitz, a marriage lawyer from New York also explained, the habit of keeping the financial secret with a partner will be a very serious problem.
"I can see that this can be a much more serious situation if their income is lower, or if there are unpaid bills as a result of one person deciding to hoard family income," he said,
The statements of Don Grant and Marilyn Chinitz are attested by Corri Fetman, a family-specific lawyer. He stated that a number of divorce cases that he handled indicate the factor of financial fraud is a matter that can not be considered trivial. A number of divorces that he handled also occurred because of these factors.
"The unfolding of financial problems between couples, including dishonesty couples in sharing financial information, assets owned, and daily shopping is a behavior that can drag the couple to the divorce table," added Fetman. The solution of financial problems is also discussed in The Most Important Talk You Need to Have Before Marriage. The article explains the need for couples to discuss financial life long before deciding to live together and marry. Arrangement and agreement from the beginning of this becomes a form of openness of a very important partner.
The tendency of someone to use money can actually be seen from the beginning of the relationship. Whether a person is a frugal person, or prefers shopping for cheap goods, and so forth, can be known as introspective acquaintances and relationships.
From the habits or the tendency of couples in managing money is everyone can actually anticipate potential problems in the future. If you already know the habits and potential problems, then the option of marriage can be preceded by building agreements and financial arrangements early.
Living by keeping secrets let alone lies, after all, like walking with unseen burdens. The person who does this must be consistent with the plot or the lie or secret narrative that he or she hides. One lie will trigger another lie is not unfounded pameo.Namun, if the problem already happened, what should be done is reconciliation. Financial planner Douglas J. Eaton offers advice on improving financial communications between couples by first solving the root of the problem, ie honestly talking about the money owed or the money they hide. Eaton also conveyed the importance of discussing about joint finances.
"Set a regular time. Can be weekly, monthly, or quarter to discuss family finances, "continued Eaton.
Eaton also proposes to involve both parties in paying household bills.
"This will create checks and balances between couples," Eaton said.
Interpersonal commitments that have made the mistake of not making the same mistakes can help heal relationships that may have cracked. The next step is to build a new budget or plan to settle the debt.